"Did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in the cage"
October 02, 2004
My dad, after a month and half there, got back from the US last Monday. While he brought back all manner of clothing and shopping for my sister and mother, he brought back two even more prized possessions for me � my old laptop, Eugene, and a video that Jing made for me which includes all (two) of the short films we made together, among other films he made that I love. I didn�t crack open Eugene until late last night. Which was a bad idea as I spent 4 hours going through old mp3s and old IM conversations I had saved. Can I just say? Those IM conversations are priceless. Who knew that I was such a skank? Honestly, most of the IM conversations I chose to save were those of me chatting with various boys I had hooked up with or was on my way to hook up with, or conversations with girlfriends discussing the previous night�s hook ups. I? I am the QUEEN of the unsubtle innuendo. Woo!
The music was just as priceless, reminding me of days gone by. And I�ve got a pretty good play list on right now. A little music from my theater days. A little music from me and Jing�s stoner days (Velvet Underground�s �Heroine,� Pink Floyd�s �Wish you were here,� Third Eye Blind�s �Wake for young souls� the only TED song I can say I actually like, and the Old 97s �Time bomb� which is just such a great song).
But speaking of me and Jing�s stoner days�while I was able to wait till last night to mess around with Eugene, I checked out the videotape the first night my dad got in. After everyone had gone to bed, which was around 3 am, and even though I had work the next day, I popped that tape in, and traveled back�
For some reason, the tape is messed up which is sad. But I was able to catch a lot of it, especially my very favorite bit, and the part I�ve been waiting to see for the past three years � a film Jing and I made one night on the blue line, and which I didn�t actually ever see after we made it. Jing had an idea for a movie/documentary where we just went on SEPTA and interviewed passengers. So one night, we did just that, taking the last train on the Market-Frankford line (around 12:30 am) and riding it all the way to the end, and then taking the shuttle bus back to campus. We met some interesting people that night. Though, interestingly, all the white people we asked to interview were very paranoid, and ultimately refused to be interviewed. So we ended up interviewing three black men � one middle-aged man looking like he was coming back from a night out; one black Muslim man on his way to work; and one 17 year-old guy, with rap star dreams (ok, not really, but he did make up a little freestyle rap about Philly for us).
Anyway, it was really fun making that. I was doing the interviewing and Jing was doing the filming (with some funky camera techniques I see!), and I dunno�. I realize that I probably wouldn�t do something like that now. I guess, I was just a little less inhibited at the time than I am now? I�m not sure. Oh, or maybe I was stoned? I asked Jing if we were (a not entirely far-fetched assumption to make about us at that time), and he says he doesn�t think we were. That �that�s just the way we were then.�
I beg to differ. Or at least, there is one point in that video that makes me thing that I, at least, was completely out of my gourd (other than the part where I am a really shy person who �boldly� interviewed random people on the night train).
Throughout the video, between interviews with people, Jing and I were having our own conversation, which mostly consisted, from what I can tell, of me bitching about my best friend from high school. The video actually starts with us walking to catch the train and me talking about her (sounding very American, according to my sister), and then the conversation kind of picks up where it left off as we are on the shuttle bus home after finishing with the interviews. Though I can�t really tell exactly what is being said, Jing and I are obviously talking about relationships of some sort (whether friendships or romantic relationships, I can�t tell. Probably a little bit of both). The part of the conversation that convinces me that I wasn�t�all there, comes towards the end of the clip. Jing is just holding the camera filming out the bus windows and you can kind of see our reflections in the windows. He is talking, and I mumble something and then he very clearly says, �Well, why do you think that is?�
And I?
I say, �I�..� Loaded silence. Could be a thoughtful silence. �I��
{tumbleweed} {tumbleweed} {cricket} {tumbleweed}
�I don�t know.�
People, it took me what seems like 5 minutes to come up with the brilliant and insightful response, �I don�t know.�
Heh.
Anyway, I need to watch that video again and see what else I can catch. Sadly, a lot of the stuff that Jing put at the end of the tape � like clips of his senior thesis � are not clear at all. I feel like I am missing out.
Anyway, I should go back to work. This entire weekend has been about studying, and I am sick of it, but am slowly progressing through the piles of shit I have to read before my comps (in two weeks! Ack!), and my papers.
We�re just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl
Year after year
Running over the same grounds
What have we found?
The same old fears
Wish you were here